How To Be Well Read ... A 2017 Goal

One of the first things I mentioned on my New Years Goals list was to stop buying so many books... so you may be surprised to find me only 25 days into the month, discussing what books I'm planning on buying.

Well, part of my plan for 2017 is to stop frivolously buying books. Which means, stop buying YA fantasy books when I already have a tonne to read. But, I am a self confessed book buying addict which means that going cold turkey is not going to happen. Especially now that I've bagged myself a job that is a mere stone's throw away from Waterstones. Instead, I am allowing myself a mere 12-15 books to buy this year. Yes. 12-15 for the entire year! 

Considering I could easily buy 10+ per shopping trip, this is a huge change to the usual for me and I for one am excited for it. The main thing for me however, is to change the type of books I'm reading. Christmas 2015 I was kindly brought "How to be Well Read" by John Sutherland, which is a list of 500 critically acclaimed (or controversial) books that you should aim to tick off if you want to become "Well Read" now whilst I find the idea of being Well Read or not rather pointless (why force yourself to read literature that you don't enjoy purely to say you've done so?) this book does highlight some key books that are not only acclaimed but important reads. This is something that I really wanted to include in my 2017 reading lists. 

Many of the books that I have shortlisted for this year are feminist or sociological critiques on society and I would really love to develop my understanding on these subject matters over the course of the year to not only make me a more well rounded reader, but also a well rounded human being. 

My 2017 list is as follows:

Lucius Apuleius - The Golden Ass (AD 160) 

Margaret Atwood - The Handmaid's Tale (1985)

Orson Scott Card - Enders Game (1985)

Angela Carter - Nights of the Circus (1984)

George Eliot - Middlemarch (1872)

Neil Gaiman - American Gods (2001)

Kazuo Ishiguro - The Remains of the Day (1989)

Haruki Murakami - IQ84 (2009-10)

George Orwell - 1984 (1942)

Sylvia Plath - The Bell Jar (1963)

Thomas Pynchan - Bleeding Edge (2013)

Jean Rhys - Wide Sargasso Sea (1966)

I'm really excited to get reading these 12. I'm aiming to read one a month and buy one a month... although I may have accidentally gone out and brought both The Handmaid's Tale and Nights of the Circus... yeah. In my defense I had a £10 off stamp card + about £10 on my points app so it had to happen really didn't it? 

The extra 3 books I'm accounting for are my most anticipated releases of 2017. Both the TOG and ACOTAR (Feyre's Arc) series by Sarah J Maas are coming to an end this year and there will be a new ADSOM book out by V.E Schwab. These books are must buys for me so they are OBVIOUSLY going to be brought. 

I would really love to know if you would be interested in reading full reviews for each of these books? I really enjoy analysing books and since leaving Uni I've not had much cause to, so if that would interest you then please let me know in the comments!

2017 Wishlist

2017 has already started with a bang, as I'm pleased to announce... I'VE GOT A JOB! 

Oh yes! That's right, no more posts moaning about my lack of employment and how bored I am. 

I'm now proud to say that at the end of January I will be the new Marketing Officer with my local Theatre! I'm absolutely over the moon to have been offered the job, it's really cliche but it's genuinely my dream job. I get to be surrounded by creative lovely people everyday working on things that I'm genuinely really excited about! Needless to say, I am probably the happiest I've been for months!

So all this excitement about new year and new job, has left me with a pretty hefty Wishlist for 2017! 

• A driving licence! - Now that I've got a job, I'm really keen to get my driving license so that I don't have to suffer the torments of public transport for too long! 
• Chanel Vitalumiere Aqua Foundation - I ran out of this foundation ages ago and I have been pining for it for ages, but with a £30+ price tag it's not budget friendly when you are living from a rapidly diminishing savings pot!
• MacBook Pro case  - I recently bought a MacBook Pro, secondhand from my best friend who was buying one of the brand new super fancy ones. I am totally in love with it and I don't think I will ever be able to go back to using a Windows Laptop ever again if I'm being honest! She gave me a load of cases for it, but I would really like a nice sleek Marble effect one... I'm painfully basic like that, I don't even care.
• A holiday abroad! - Dan and I haven't been on holiday since 2015 and we are really longing for a nice hot beach holiday somewhere with plenty of fresh fruit & veg and beautiful scenic walks. 2016 was a bit of a bitch of a year if I'm being honest (I think it was for a lot of us!) so we would love to have a week somewhere sunny to just relax and enjoy ourselves.  
• To rescue a couple of Cats - Dan and I are planning on moving out this year and the most important thing on our list is to adopt a couple of Cats from my local Cat rescue. The woman that runs it does such an amazing job (both my Cats at home are from her and they are beautiful) so we would really love to rescue a couple more fluff balls and give them their forever homes. 
• To visit the theatre more often -  This should be pretty easy now that I'm working at one, but I absolutely love going to the theatre. I have a particular interest (read: obsession) with Shakespeare and I've only had the opportunity to see a handful of the plays, I aim to change that this year! 
• Cacti/ Succulent - This was on my A/W wishlist but I've still not managed to find one that I love enough to buy. I really love having plants on my desk so I'm hopeful that I will be able to find the perfect Succulent in the next few months to brighten up my desk at home (and maybe work if it's allowed!) 

So that's it really! I couldn't think of anything else to wish for from 2017. I've covered some other points in my New Years Goals post incase you are interested to read more about what I hope to come out of 2017! 

What's on your wishlist this year? 

Embracing Hygge For The Winter

Hi-gge, Hoo-gar or however you're meant to pronounce it, has been somewhat of a buzz word in 2016, sweeping social media with a promise of that infamous Danish happiness. 

         But what really is hygge and how are we meant to achieve such an instagrammable 'high' in dreary ole' blighty?! 

Well, with the help of Meik Wiking's book "The little book of Hygge", I aim to give you a handy little list of ways to incorporate some Hyggestund (A moment of Hygge) into our daily lives this winter. 

          So the big question: 

What the hell is Hygge and why should I care? 

Meik writes that "Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience, rather than about things. It is about being with the people we love. A feeling of home." 

Which all sounds pretty Disney in its idealistic notion that "home is where the heart is" and such other cliches. But it really seems like the Danish are perhaps on to something...

Denmark was awarded No 1: World Happiness in 2016 and was No 1: OECD Better Life Index. Life Satisfaction in 2015. YET, Denmark sees some of the highest levels of tax and weather wise it is rather grotty, to say the least. 

So why are they so happy? 

Meik suggests this is in part down to the importance of Hygge in Danish society. 

So how can we Brits, renowned for our general cynicism about pretty much everything (except tea and marmite), introduce some of this cuddly and borderline obnoxious happiness into our day-to-day lives? 

Well, I've got 10 tips on how to do just that: 

1. Candles, all the Candles. - Lighting is apparently quite a big deal to the Danes, probably because in the winter they have very few hours of sunlight. Candles are a pretty common way of injecting cosiness into our lives and I feel like this is already a pretty popular trend in the western world as it is. However, apparently, there is no need to splash out on some scented delight from Yankee to create your Hyggelig environment. Plain unscented candles are favoured by the danish as its all to do with the soft lighting and not so much about having your room smell like a victorian pantry.

2. Fluffy Socks. - Cosiness is paramount to hygge and nothing screams comfort quite like a super fluffy, soft pair of socks. 

3.Put down the phone & pick up a book. - You've got a candle burning and your feet are resembling a Yeti. Put down your phone and live in the moment, Social media can often be overwhelming and is definitely not conducive to a hyggelig evening. I like to switch off from the internet & media and spend a couple of hours reading with Dan at night. It's so relaxing and it's much easier to put down a book to chat than it is a laptop/phone. 

4. Wrap up warm & go for a winter walk. - I did this the other weekend with Dan and my family, it was so lovely to walk down to the seaside and see the sunset over the sea (you could make a tongue twister out of that!). It felt truly hygge as it was a moment of family & togetherness totally forgetting about the outside world and focusing on the beauty of the moment. Best of all... it was totally free! 

5. Comfort Food. - This isn't so much about ordering in a takeaway but more about taking the care and time to create something comforting. For me, that is definitely my Butternut Squash & Halloumi Fajitas with Homemade Guacamole. This is my go-to comfort meal and my whole family love it as well. The ingredients are fairly inexpensive and it's super easy to cook, but it's such a warming meal and really makes me feel soothed and comforted inside. 

6. Movie/ TV night in. - If you're not bookish and don't fancy leaving the house anytime soon, you can always snuggle down for a few hours in front of the box. Put on a favourite film or watch a TV series you love. Just make sure there is plenty of cushions, a snuggly throw to hand and of course warm popcorn waiting to be devoured. 

7. Hot Drinks. - Be it Tea or Coffee, this is something us Brits will have no problem in achieving. We as a nation are infamous for our love of Tea and it just so happens to be one of the most important aspects of Hygge. If I'm out and about, I will always opt for an Eggnog Latte from Starbucks (if the season permits!) However, for a Hygge evening at home nothing beats M&S Rooibos, Cocoa Nib & Vanilla tea. It's a Hygge hug in a cup. 

8. Create a Hygge work environment. - This may not always be possible depending on where you work, but trying to add some hygge into your work day can really help to make you feel calm and happy(er). Be it a plant on your desk and your favourite tea to drink. Or even just a hyggelig playlist to listen to on your way to and from work, there are always ways to inject that sense of comfort into your day to day life. 

I've recently hygge'd my workspace at home by adding fairy lights, plants, candles and generally decluttering the area. I've noticed my productivity go up and I'm feeling more motivated than ever to get writing!

9. Hyggelig Fashion. - According to Meik, there are some unspoken rules when it comes to Hygge fashion. The basis seems to be: Scarfs, Comfy Jumpers & Cardigans + all the black and white clothing that you can possibly get your hands on. 

Hygge fashion seems to be minimalist comfort through and through and I am totally down with that!

10. Allow time for Hygge. - Finally, the most important aspect of Hygge is to slow down. Make time to experience hygge. Even if you're only able to indulge yourself at the weekend, or maybe just an hour on Sunday, make sure you do so. To me, Hygge is more than beautiful aesthetics and Disney-esqe levels of happiness, it's instead like another form of self-care. It's giving yourself time to assess your needs and comfort yourself. So when you strip back the pinterest worthy look and social media frenzy, what you really get is the age-old notion of simply and unapologetically allowing yourself time just to be. 

I hope you enjoyed reading this post as much as I enjoyed writing it.  

I hope you have a hyggelig evening! 

December TBR

So after last months total fail of a TBR (See this post on my November Round-Up for the details), I have learnt my lesson a little bit and have only chosen 5 books and a graphic novel to get through in the hectic and christmas filled month that is December. 

Although, two books are re-reads so I guess they don't really count, but I'm going to add them regardless as it makes me feel better at the very least. 

The re-reads are obviously ACOTAR & ACOMAF, I adore these books and I'm planning on reading them over Christmas as an extra present to myself. I'm really looking forward to getting familiar with Rhysand again 😏😏 oh and also experiencing all the rage with Tamlin from the very first mention of him. (If you've read this series so far then you know what I'm talking about.) 

Another thing I should mention is that I've actually already started A Storm of Swords (I'm notourious for taking about 6-9months to get through just one GOT book), I've read just a little over 130 pages according to my goodreads so I've still got a tonne to get through but I'm hoping to finish it this side of 2017. 

So in reality, I've only got 2 full books, a Graphic Novel and 80% of A Storm of Swords to read this month and then ACOTAR and ACOMAF are just like little bonus extras for myself. 

The List:

A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas

A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas

The Shadow Queen by C.J Redwine

Stealing Snow by Danielle Paige

A Storm of Swords, 1: Steel and Snow by George R.R. Martin

The Wicked and The Divine: Fandemonium by Kieron Gillen (+McKelvie, Wilson & Cowles)

What's on your TBR this month? 

You can track my progress over on my GoodReads page. 

A/W 2016 London Haul!

Last Saturday I went to London to see P!ATD perform at the Alexandra Palace... OMG it was so goddamn good! Bredon Urie has the voice of an angel and absolutely killed it + Sophie, Dan and I had a massive laugh over the fact we were some of the oldest there that weren't chaperoning children (apparently P!ATD appeal to a young audience nowadays...) but on the plus side the Bar was basically empty the entire evening! 

So OBVIOUSLY because we had to travel to London anyway we decided to make a day of it do some shopping, have some lunch and meet up with Sophie who lives just outside of Central (and is totally smashing life right now) for a browse around Oxford Street. 

So obviously I had to share what I brought as hauls don't come very often over here on Bambi's Blogs.  

LUSH OXFORD STREET

Lord of Misrule - £3.95

This is a Lush classic, and shockingly, I've never used it before. I don't know why but previously when I've sniffed it in store, it's never really appealed to me. It smelt a little too much like wet leaves to me and I just didn't get it. But this year. Oh boy, did it kick me in the face this year when I picked it up! It's spicy, rich and so deliciously autumnal it is the perfect autumn bath bomb and I am in love. You can tell I loved it because I bought two of them and I never do that. 

I usually cut up my bath bombs to get multiple uses out of them (unemployed graduate life) but this one demanded to be used whole and I am soo glad I did. As soon as you put the ballistic in the water it starts to fizz and emits plumes of green and pink foam which are really beautiful to watch. After a couple of minutes in the hot water, you will start to hear cracking and popping, that's because this little beauty is loaded with popping candy which is quite an unusual experience, especially when you're not expecting it and worry that you bath is breaking 🙈

Once the bath bomb has finished fizzing and fully dissolved you're left with a beautiful wine coloured bath, as photographed below (I was going to upload this to my Insta but I didn't like it enough. Yes that is the side of my thigh 💁) 

Satsuma Bath Bomb (Christmas Oxford Street Exclusive) - £3.95

This is rather self-explanatory and indeed smells just like a satsuma, it's fruity, fresh, citrusy and somehow it smells very Christmassy despite the fruitiness and lacking the spicy element that I associate with the season. I've not used this yet, but I think it's safe to assume that this is going to create a bright orange bath - I think it would be amazing paired with You've Been Mangoed.

Monsieur Gustave Bath Melt (Oxford Street Exclusives) £2

It's becoming a habit of mine now to pick up a couple of the exclusive bath melts every time I go to Oxford Street. I love bath melts and I think they are so brilliantly versatile and I always get a couple of uses out of them as I tend to mix them with a bath bomb or bubble bar. This one has what I can only describe as a blackcurrant/musky smell. I can't really describe it so it's definitely one to go and smell in person. What sold it for me was the prospect of having a glittery purple bath.

Lime Pastille Bath Melt (Oxford Street Exclusive) £2

The second of the aforementioned bath melts. This, as the name would suggest, smells like lime sherbert. It's a beautiful fresh crisp smell that is definitely more appropriate for the summer months but it was too good to pass it up! Although, I could imagine this working very nicely with So White Bath Bomb. 

Can we appreciate the beauty of that YA section in Foyles THO. ^  

I also indulged my other love whilst in London, books. Dan and I have got book shopping in London down to a precise art now and we know exactly what big bookstores and second-hand bookstores we love. We didn't have heaps of time to spend today so my favourite second-hand bookshops were missed and instead we focused on my favourite three... Foyles, Forbidden Planet & the Piccadilly Waterstones (or as I call it, Heaven).  

The Wicked & The Divine - Fandemonium Pt. 2 - £0.00 -  Forbidden Planet

All of the inner fangirl comes out when I walk into Forbidden Planet. It's one of my favourite bookstores ever (the one in Cambridge is great as well), they are well known for their vast array of Graphic Novels, Comic Books & Manga but they also sell a huge amount of YA, Fantasy and Sci-Fi. I adore this shop and could happily spend hours in here and spend a small fortune. However, on this particular day, I didn't have either the time nor the money! 

I've already read the first instalment of The Wicked & The Divine and I adored the artwork, it's absolutely beautiful in the way in which it is illustrated and the story is strange, enticing and mysterious. I really enjoyed the first part and I felt like it finished in such a way that I just had to buy the next in the series. 

If you like stories that are shrouded in mystery and unanswered questions and beautiful artwork, then you will love this graphic novel. 

Snow Like Ashes by Sara Raasch - £0.00 - Foyles
Once we had finished in Forbidden planet we then went on to Foyles. I always insist on browsing the entire store even though I know deep down that I'm only going to end up buying YA. On the day we were there Grayson Perry was doing a book signing a few hours later so we were lucky to miss the rush of fans -  but it's also alerted me to the fact that Grayson has a book out and I really need it in my life.

I picked up this book at the recommendation (read: fangirling) of my lovely pal Ash over at aislingsbeautybytes.blogspot.co.uk. She loved this book and highly recommended it, so as I wholeheartedly trust her opinion I decided it was worth picking up and adding to the overwhelming pile of books to read.

From what I can grasp this is a book with a strong female lead who basically has to restore magic to her kingdom so it can rise to power again. It sounds pretty epic and has a rather impressive 4.01 rating on Goodreads (out of 30,323 ratings) so I have high hopes for this.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo - £0.00 - Foyles

This was another recommendation from Ash and is one that I have heard SO much about in the book world due to the sequel "Crooked Kingdom" coming out at the end of September. I know this is set in the Grisha world and many people suggest that reading the Grisha Trilogy by Leigh Bardugo first is perhaps a more sensible idea rather than jumping into the world unprepared. 

I do own the first in the Grisha Trilogy so that's probably what I'm going to do, but I'm really excited to get my teeth stuck into such a dense and rich world. 

This is about a group of six different criminals/outcasts who have been tasked to perform a deadly heist that may well make them rich beyond their wildest dreams. This sounds so fun, so unusual and I think it will be a real page turner! I'm going to start the Grisha Trilogy in December as I just can't wait any longer! 

Stealing Snow by Danielle Paige - £0.00 - Waterstones

I'm a huge fan of Danielle Paige's work, I love the Dorothy Must Die series (although I haven't finished it as I'm waiting for "Yellow Brick War" to become available in paperback!) so when I heard that she was releasing another fairy tale retelling but this time it was one of my favourite stories - The Snow Queen - I was absolutely over the moon. 

Can we take a minute to appreciate the beauty of that cover? Have you ever seen a book more appropriate for the Christmas season? I really do think the U.K cover has got the edge on the U.S cover this time!  

This is probably one of the most interesting plots for a novel that I've come across in a long time. The main character Snow has spent her life locked in a Psychiatric Hospital but she isn't crazy. Instead, she finds a way to escape the hospital only to find that she has a kingdom to inherit and a prophecy to complete. 

This is another book that I'm almost certainly going to indulge myself with in December. 

So that's it! It wasn't a huge haul and the day went far too quickly for my liking but it was brilliant and I can't wait to go back to London soon (hopefully for a job!) although I'm sure my bank balance will once again suffer!

A/W Reading Recommendations

Autumn/Winter is the perfect time of year for snuggling down with a blanket and a spicy candle and getting absorbed into a good read. The rain taps at your windows, a candle flickers and your radiators are on full heat, now let me suggest what to pick up on those days when the furthest you're prepared to walk is the kitchen. 

Hygge by Meik Wiking 

- When planning this post, Hygge felt like an obvious choice. Hygge explores how the Danish have upheld their reputation as being one of the happiest countries in the world. Hygge is all things cosy, blankets, hot chocolate and candles. It's such a calming and informative read that it will have you wanting to snuggle under a blanket with a warm drink in an instant. Ideal for those rainy dreary days when you need a pick-me-up. 

A Christmas Carol and Other Christmas Writings by Charles Dickens 

- Sometimes you can't beat a classic. Everyone knows the story of Scrooge and the ghosts but there is something magical about reading it around Christmas and experiencing the story be it for the first time or the 100th. Also, let's just take a moment to appreciate how beautiful the Penguin Clothbound edition is 😍

Stealing Snow by Danielle Paige 

-A new purchase and the only book on this list that I haven't read. But can you find a more Wintery book? I love the story of The Snow Queen and I've heard that this is a Snow Queen retelling with a twist. I'm realllly looking forward to indulging myself with this book and getting transported away. 

A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas 
- Probably not an immediate choice when you think autumn/winter but I first read this book in the Autumn and was totally obsessed. For me this novel is a year round read but I'm going to be re-reading it (and ACOMAF) over Christmas as a little gift to myself because OMG these books. 😱 This is a perfect night time read to get cuddled under a duvet and read about dangerous Fae and a heroine that kicks ass.

A Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin 

- I feel like autumn/winter is the ideal time to get your head stuck into a tome. So many people avoid reading the GOT series because of the sheer size of the books (I feel you, it takes me MONTHS to finish these!) but in A/W you have so much more time to laze around and just read. Ideal for tackling a book that intimidates you. 

30 "Reasons Why I'm a Dick" Facts About Me

1.  I love to make self-indulgent listicles talking about myself. 
2.  I just used the word Listicle. 
3. As with pretty much every list I write, there's always a little fan girl in the back of my head wanting it to go viral... cause you know... I'm alllllll about that dollar. #helpmeimpoor. 
4. I genuinely find myself funny. I will always laugh at my own jokes. 
5. I'm writing this purely for my own amusement apologies if you're bored rigid already. 
6.  I don't comment enough on other people's blogs. Like I read them... but I don't comment. I'm a bad person. 
7. I'm one of those people that will tip spare change in restaurants - "here's 25p made up from the coppers, I don't even think you deserve a tip but you're welcome! please don't spit in my food"  
8. I refuse to pay for bottled water unless that's the only drink I'm having, in which case I make a huge deal about the fact I'm drinking bottled water ... I've been known to take the glass bottle home with me. 
9. I get mind-numbingly envious over bloggers that started last week and already have 10,000 followers... *internal sobs into almond dream ice-cream*
10. I'm a dietary requirement nightmare. Pescetarian with dairy intolerance... restaurants are hell. 
11. I genuinely love my cats more than 90% of people. 
12. I speak for my cats. Tigger has a Russian accent. I don't know why.
13. Tigger is also actually a mooncub and is from the moon. He seeks to destroy human kind. 
14. You have no idea how funny I find the above two facts. 
15. I'm at that point where I'm starting to feel smug about being in the same relationship for almost 9 years. 13-year old me knew what she wanted in life. Screw you countless people that told me I was too young to settle down!
16. Even though I haven't found employment yet, I'm still not going to apply to work in my local co-op... I can't do it to myself. I left when I was 17 and I'm not going back! 
17. I own around 200 books and I have 60 or so to read, yet,  I'm still going on a book haul in a few days... YOLO.
18. I still use YOLO.
19. I hate being stereotyped as an Essex girl to the point where I've told people I was from Suffolk.
20. I can't share food. At all. 
21. I will eat cheese knowing that it will make me ill and I will still moan that other people allowed me to eat it. 
22. I own over 100 nail polishes but will consistently use the same 5-6. Ooops. 
23. I hate speaking on the phone. If it's for business or important reasons I'm fine, but if you pass me the phone for a friendly chat to a family member expect that phone to be thrown back at you. 
24. I frequently wonder if my life is actually a dream and I'm going to wake up as a toddler. 
25. I can become obsessed with something really quickly and then just as quickly forget about it. 
26. I will full on ugly cry if I'm hungry and there isn't anything around that I fancy eating. 
27. I have a love/hate relationship with Avocado. Why do you taste so shit on your own but you're so heavenly with chipotle & garlic granules?
28. I spent 3 years moaning about University and now I've left I have spent more time crying over missing it than I ever did when I was actually there. 
29. This is the second year in a row when I've committed myself to NaNoWriMo but haven't actually managed to write anything... sigh.
30. I never actually intended to write 30 facts.
31. This is my last fact and it's not even no.30... how anti-climactic. 

I hope you enjoyed this little random post. I just felt like writing something to make myself laugh. You gotta do, what you gotta do. 

Baby Steps To Self-Care

If you're looking for a post that tells you to run a lush bath and make a cup of tea then this is not your post. Instead, I want to talk about the real basics of self-care, the baby steps if you will. The things that are important to maintain a healthy mind. Not the flourishes and cutesy fun stuff that can come later. Whilst I'm a huge fan of baths and tea, this is not the time for it. Here's my self-care tips if you are having a terrible day, week, month, hell even year. 

1. Set an alarm, when you wake up open your curtains and make your bed. - By setting an alarm and waking up to it you are acknowledging the day's start. Don't put it off by staying in bed for hours, it can lead to negative thoughts. Instead, when your alarm goes off, get up and get out. Open your curtains/blinds let in the sun. Make your bed. It's a simple thing but it means that you've got a task ticked off your list only minutes after you've woken up. Look at you, you're being productive already! 

2. Have some form of breakfast - I'm not going to lecture you here and tell you to make a full breakfast because truth be known I don't eat breakfast myself 98% of the time. If eating in the morning isn't your thing, make yourself drink (I know I said no tea, but hear me out!). You need to get some fluids back into your system after being asleep. It's also a great motivator to get you out of bed. I normally get up, open my curtains, make my bed and then go downstairs to make myself a coffee before I do anything else. 

3. Shower/bath or clean your face - It's so easy for someone to say go have a shower and wash your hair. I know how draining that can feel if you're in a rut. I'm not going to guilt trip you or judge you if you don't shower for a day. If you can't bare the thought of showering or having a bath then just wash your face. It doesn't have to be with products you don't even need a flannel (although, I would advise a nice cleanser and flannel for optimal results). I feel groggy and useless when I've not washed my face, cleansing your skin is such a basic thing but it really can make you feel brighter on a shit day. 

4. Make a list - Organise yourself at the beginning of the day. Plan when you're going to have food and what you're going to have (more on that in a moment), plan to get some small tasks done, maybe put on a load of washing, tidy up your main living area or reorganise a drawer that is getting messy and annoying you. Getting small tasks ticked off early can help to lift your mood and helps to make you feel more in control of life. 

5. Plan for fun - Allow yourself some time in the day to do what you want to do. Read a book, Watch a TV show, do some mindfulness activities, draw, go for a walk. Do whatever you need to do to feel relaxed and happy. It doesn't matter if you spend 30 minutes or 5 hours doing this. Just do it. Make time for you. 

6. Eat well - Not necessarily healthily. Food is something to be enjoyed but it is also nourishment. I'm not going to recommend getting fast food or takeaways as it doesn't offer any nutritional goodies or the therapeutic effect of cooking for yourself. Instead, make an old favourite or try a new yummy recipe (highly recommend Pinterest for that) But try to include a couple of vegetables limit the dairy content. My favourite food when I'm feeling rubbish is Quorn 'chicken' burgers with homemade garlic wedges and salad. The wedges and Quorn burger offer the comfort side, but I don't feel guilty because of the salad. Having takeaway or fast food when you're feeling low is not a good idea, you can start to use it as an emotional crutch (trust me I've been there) and you will only feel negatively towards yourself after eating it because you know it's bad for you. 

7. Get some air - Whilst I would recommend going for a walk or sitting in your garden for half an hour, I'm aware this isn't always possible. If you can't leave the house and don't have a garden then open a window, get some fresh air in. The cool air helps to clear a foggy mind and can help to make you feel refreshed. 

8 Go to bed - Get an early night. Try to start winding down around 9-10pm and aim to be asleep before 12pm. Getting at least 8 hours sleep is really important but I've found that often I need around 9-10 hours to feel even vaguely human the next day. When you start to feel tired don't fight it. Allow yourself to rest, acknowledge that you deserve it and that anything that hasn't been completed in that day can be tackled the next. 

These things may seem really obvious and self-explanatory but I know I've had days where even the little things have felt like a monumental task. If you're having a rough time rememeber to be gentle on yourself. You are imporant and worthy of time and care. You deserve to be looked after and you deserve to nourish and look after your body. We are too often are own harshest critics and forget to be cheerleaders. 

Look after yourself. 

Loneliness

For a long time, I felt alone. Clouded by the shadows of loneliness, I couldn't see, nor appreciate, the support I had around me. The black fog that shrouded my mind felt like a suffocating mist that was inescapable. But I did. I escaped it. If you're reading this and the feeling I describe resonates with you, just know that you can escape it as well. 

I left uni feeling triumphant. I had lived with bad housemates for 2 years straight (although I was also living with my best friend which was my only saviour) so the feeling of being free from University and back to living at the home I had pined for was meant to be liberating. I was meant to feel free. 

I didn't. 

Gone were the days of living with a city on my doorstep, a best friend down the hall and a week filled with purpose. Instead, my independent life had been replaced with that of the 18-year-old I had left behind. I had been living at home in my holiday's from uni but it was always just a holiday, I knew I was going back to uni in a matter of weeks and despite usually feeling upset to go back, I was always truly at home when I was in Canterbury. But I'm only just coming to terms with that now. 

When you're surrounded by friends and peers almost every day for about 3 years you begin to take the normal world for granted. Living back at home was more of a reality check than I had anticipated, I suddenly realised that all my friends back at home who didn't leave for uni had fully formed lives. They had jobs, career's even! They had groups of friends that didn't include me, social lives that didn't include me and I found myself in a place that was always home, but I no longer fit in it. 

Obviously, my friends are still my friends and I don't begrudge them having their own lives and other friends and I certainly didn't expect them to drop everything and spend all their free time with me, but for some reason my brain had imagined a rose-tinted world after leaving uni and real life isn't rose tinted. I had to make do with feeling like an imposter, trying to force my way back into the few friendships I had managed to hold on to throughout University. I felt as if no one wanted me around and that I was a burden to everyone.

I hit rock bottom. I woke up one day and felt like the world would be the same, if not happier, without me. That was when I realised the hole I had got myself into. 

I had two options at that point. I could let the thoughts spiral out of my control, or I could register what I was feeling and do something about it. I was strong enough to choose the latter. 

I picked myself up and did something about it. I reconnected with my friends, I made them aware of how I was feeling and only received support and love. My boyfriend (who I should note has always been there) was able to distract me and encouraged me to take back control of my life, he taught me not to be a victim to my own mind. 

I became obsessed with this blog, have you noticed the increase in posts the last couple of months? Yeah, this is my coping mechanism! I stopped obsessing over job hunting and decided to focus on the artistic side of me. I am a typical creative type and can't deal with the stress of a corporate world, I need something that allows me to express my creativity and until that job opportunity becomes available then I will not be jumping through hurdles to gain employment. Instead, I'm looking for alternate ways to make money through my creativity.  I'm thankful every day to have the privilege to make that decision and know that I will still have a roof over my head and food in my belly. I don't take my parents kindness, patience and love for granted. 

I was able to make new friends! I started chatting to some fellow bloggers about books and one month down the line we still talk daily, I can't emphasise enough how helpful this has been for my mental health. Just having a group of girls to chat to that totally get me and are the most supportive people you could ever speak to, has made the world of difference and I'm so thankful. 

I've learnt to appreciate what I have and not what I'm lacking. Loneliness is only a mindset. It's not a real tangible thing, you can't buy a cure from Boots. It's something that is only in your head, in your perception of the world and it's something that only you can escape. 

Once you mentally push the black fog away, the sky becomes clearer, the birds begin to sing and the world comes alive and blooms. Allow yourself to push back those thoughts, allow yourself to fill that emptiness with something you love and I can guarantee you will never feel lonely again. 

I've written this post-loneliness, I don't want sympathy, help or even support. I just want awareness. Awareness that loneliness is crippling and that if someone opens up to you and explains that they feel lonely you need to help them clear that fog, allow them to see their worth and help them take back their life. Loneliness can be a passing problem, but it can also lead down a destructive path. 

If you're reading this and are feeling the same, just know that it can be beaten. You can take control of your life but you have to do it yourself. You have to sit and make the decision to not be a victim to your own brain anymore. Once you can do that, you can do anything. I believe in you. 

As always, if you need someone to chat to, feel free to drop me a DM on twitter or email me at bambisblogs@gmail.com. 

My A/W Wishlist

A/W always gets me feeling spendy, whether it's because of the change of season or just my mind preparing for Christmas (Yes, I know it's October, sorry not sorry) I always manage to accumulate a list of things that I didn't know I needed until the autumn season set in. 

So today I thought I would share that list for no other reason that I thought it would be a good blog post and I enjoy lists. Yeah, top quality content right here yo. 

1. A Calligraphy Pen - Story time: When I was a wee lass, i.e: 10 or so, I was brought a calligraphy set for my birthday, the booklet inside described how to write in old-fashioned medieval script and I absolutely loved it. However, I was useless. Utterly rubbish, and at that time if I wasn't great at something I tended to give it up pretty darn quick. Flash forward 5-6 years and I started using calligraphy/fountain pens in my art lessons for line-art and fell in love with the scratchy nibs and deep Black India ink. But once school finished I never continued with that technique, always preferring my trusty Faber-Castell PITT artist pens, that offered a more reliable line.  Flash forward a further 6 years (god I'm old) and now "Modern Calligraphy" and hand lettering is all the rage. I realllly want to get back into it so I'm hoping that I will be able to purchase a new pen & ink in the coming months. 

2. Desk Lamp - I'm working at the desk in my room more and more now, but as the evenings are drawing in it's getting harder to do. I've found the perfect lamp at Dunelm Mill though, it's copper and oh so aesthetically appealing. 

3. Autumnal Candles - I mean OBVIOUSLY. I've actually already gone out and brought more candles but I'm still including it on the list because you can NEVER have enough scented goodness in your life. 

4. Succulents/Cacti - I already have a Bamboo Plant that is heavily featured in 90% of my blog photos and I recently acquired another little succulent style plant with little pink flowers (Don't ask me the name because I've totally forgotten it), but I would really love some little Cacti to join them on my desk. Plants really help to keep me feeling fresh and happy when I'm  working and positively impact my mental health so enough is never enough. 

5. Topshop Joni Jeans - Do I even need to explain this? These are for real my favourite jeans ever. Super stretchy, super comfy, but so pricey. I will be saving up for a new pair of these as I just haven't found a pair of jeans that fits so comfortably and stops me looking like a potato. 

6. The Little Book of Hygge - Now no longer on my list as my lovely other half decided to surprise me with this as a little random gift to cheer me up after a particularly stressful week. If you love being cosy and want to know how the danish have earnt their reputation as one of the happiest nations then look no further.

7. Thyme & Mint Candle - This seems exceptionally random but hear me out, my local Fenwicks has some amazing candles. One of which is a "Thyme and Mint" Candle that no lie smells identical to a restaurant in Crete that I've been going to since I was 6. It's a really beautiful Mediterranean smell that holds so many memories for me and I would absolutely love to get my hands on this to save for when Dan & I move out in 2017. 

8. NYX Soft Matte Lip Cream - I've got a major love for these and I would really like to grab some darker, seasonal shades. I've currently got my eyes on Rome, Berlin and Vancouver. 

9. Wall Art - I've been working on getting my room looking more like an adult uses it rather than the 16-year-old that it represented when I moved back into my family home after leaving Uni. One major part of this is taking down the posters full of teenage angst and replacing them with some wall art. I've recently brought some Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy digital prints for my wall that I cannot wait to get printed and framed.  

10. Lush Halloween & Christmas - You guys know I'm a huge Lushie, and I have been stopping myself from buying any of the range for the past month because I will be visiting the Oxford Street store in November. I'm super excited to grab as much of the ranges as I can although I have a feeling that I will be too late for the Halloween collection!

11. Chanel Vitalumiere Aqua - My all-time, hands down favourite foundation. I have also tried the Les Beiges foundation but I just haven't gotten on with it as well. This is obviously a real luxury product at £33 for a bottle but it is so worth the money and leaves my skin looking flawless. 

12. Books - Nice a vague and for a good reason. When I visit London in November I will be visiting Picadilly Waterstones, Foyles and Forbidden Planet. I don't have a set amount of books I want to buy and I don't have a specific list as honestly I don't have the money nor space to store many more books... my shelves are quite literally overflowing. However, I am a realist and I know that I will end up buying books. So that's why this is on my wishlist. Also, you can never have enough books, right? 

13. Washi Tape - I'm getting really into Washi Tape for my bullet journal at the moment and I'm really enjoying using it to brighten up the pages and create some interest. I would love to get some more interesting colours and designs to keep mixing things up and making my journal aesthetically pleasing. 

14. Blog Props - Sometimes I feel like my photos can get a little bit stale over here and recently I've really been working on mixing things up. I'd love to be able to grab a few more blog props and things to create interest in my photos. But that is definitely easier said then done so if you have any recommendations then please leave them in the comments! 

15. Leuchtturm1917 Dotted Notebook - Yes, a new bullet journal! I'm getting through mine pretty quickly as I'm almost half way through it and I know I'm going to need a new one in 2017. I've spotted a metallic special edition one in my local Fenwicks which is REALLLLY tempting, so I may just have to make a cheeky purchase. 

16. Art Supplies - Truthfully, I don't really need any more art supplies. I've always been someone who draws and has collected a ridiculous pile of supplies over the years. However, I've only recently got back into drawing after ignoring it for a good 3-4 years and I feel like all my old art stuff no longer really belongs to me. It belongs to 16-year-old Emily who used to badly draw manga and thought she could earn money from it one day. Not 22-year-old Emily who is interested in realism and watercolours. I'm a totally different person since I last took art seriously and so I feel like I need new supplies that compliment this new mindset and the new me. I don't know if that really makes sense, but I'm sure there will be some of you out there that can understand where I'm coming from. 

What are you lusting over this autumn?